In Japan, chopsticks are an essential part of every meal. They might feel tricky at first, but once you get the hang of holding them properly, you’ll find eating becomes both easier and more enjoyable.
Chopsticks also reflect a deep connection to Japanese culture and values.
Learning how to use them the right way isn’t just about manners—it’s a step toward understanding the culture itself. So take your time, and enjoy discovering the meaning behind this everyday tradition.
Table of Contents
Chikako Higuchi
Expert in Etiquette and Communication;
Former Shiseido Beauty Consultant. At Shiseido, gained deep expertise in hospitality, aesthetics, and understanding customers’ needs. Moved to KidZania Tokyo, a job-experience theme park for children, to share these skills. Earned the Outstanding Supervisor Award for delivering courteous service and led staff etiquette training.
Later, trained over 20,000 people in etiquette across the country. Involved in publishing, writing columns, supervising magazine articles, and appearing in the media.
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Chapter 1: Basic Chopstick Etiquette
1. Where to Place Chopsticks
In Japanese dining, chopsticks are usually placed horizontally across the setting. You might wonder why—especially since Western utensils or chopsticks in Chinese cuisine are often placed vertically. In Japan, this horizontal placement carries meaning. It symbolizes a boundary. Mealtime is seen as something sacred, rooted in the idea of gratefully receiving the life of each ingredient. The space beyond the chopsticks is considered part of the natural world—a sacred realm—separate from the everyday world we live in. Laying chopsticks horizontally represents that boundary.
Because of this, it’s important to handle chopsticks with care. When not in use, place them on a chopstick rest. If one isn’t provided, some people fold the paper sleeve into a rest, though opinions vary on whether that’s proper etiquette. You can also rest the tips gently on the edge of a small dish—just be careful not to lay them across the dish, as that’s considered bad manners.
2. How to Hold Chopsticks
Let’s start with the basic way to hold chopsticks. While this isn’t the exact sequence used when picking them up during a meal, it’s helpful for learning the proper form.
(Here, the chopstick that moves is referred to as the upper chopstick, and the one that stays still is the lower chopstick.)
Hold the upper chopstick like a pen, using your thumb, index finger, and middle finger.
Slide the lower chopstick along the first joint of your ring finger, pass it through the loop made by your fingers, and secure it against the base of your thumb.
Try moving only the upper chopstick using your index and middle fingers while keeping the lower chopstick still. If the movement feels smooth, you’re holding them correctly.
When held properly, chopsticks allow you to pick up even small pieces of food with ease.
3. Posture
a. Sit up straight: Keep your back straight and avoid slouching. This helps your digestion and feels more polite.
b. Hold your bowl: Pick up small bowls, like rice or side dishes, when eating. But if the plate or bowl is bigger than your palm, it’s fine to leave it on the table.
c. Keep your face up: Don’t lean your face toward the chopsticks—bring the chopsticks up to your mouth instead. If the food might drip, hold the bowl in your other hand to catch any drops. Catching drips with your hand under the chopsticks (called “te-zara”) is considered rude.
4. Keep your elbows in: Don’t stick your elbows out—it can look messy and might bump the people next to you.
Chapter 2: Improper Chopstick Etiquette
There are certain ways of using chopsticks that are considered improper etiquette in Japan. These behaviors are regarded as inappropriate not only because they appear unsightly, demonstrate a lack of consideration for fellow diners, or are unhygienic, but also due to cultural and religious beliefs in Japan where some actions are thought to bring bad luck.
These prohibited chopstick practices are sometimes referred to as “kinji-bashi” (禁じ箸). In this chapter, we will introduce some of the most fundamental examples of improper chopstick etiquette.
1. Placing Chopsticks Across the Dish (Watashi-bashi)
Resting your chopsticks across the top of a dish during a meal is considered inappropriate. It can be mistaken as a signal that you have finished eating, which might lead to your dishes being cleared away prematurely.
2. Pulling Chopsticks Toward You (Yose-bashi)
Hooking your chopsticks on the edge of a bowl or plate and pulling it closer to yourself is considered rude. It gives the impression that you are not treating the dish carefully and can come across as rough or careless. There is also a risk of tipping over the dish.
3. Sticking Chopsticks into Food (Sashi-bashi)
Sticking your chopsticks straight into food isn’t just bad manners—it’s seen as disrespectful to both the food and the person who prepared it. People often do this when trying to grab slippery or tricky pieces, but it’s best to avoid this habit.
4. Gripping Chopsticks in a Fist (Nigiri-bashi)
Holding chopsticks in a tight fist is considered poor manners. It can make you look like a child who hasn’t yet learned how to use chopsticks properly, and it often leads to stabbing at food, which is also impolite.
5. Hovering Chopsticks (Mayoi-bashi)
Waving your chopsticks over the food while deciding what to eat is considered bad table manners. It can make you seem indecisive or restless, and may leave a negative impression on those around you.
6. Digging Around (Saguri-bashi)
Using your chopsticks to rummage through a dish in search of a specific ingredient comes across as impolite and inconsiderate. It can spoil the presentation of the food and make it seem like you’re not treating the meal—or the person who prepared it—with proper respect. It’s best to take what’s on top without picking through.
Chapter 3: Chopstick Practice Tips
If you’re not comfortable using chopsticks yet, try these simple exercises to improve your skills:
• Practice with Beans
Use small beans like chickpeas to practice picking up one at a time. It’s a great way to build precision and finger control.
• Catch the Last Grain
When eating rice, try to pick up every last grain from your bowl. In Japan, finishing your rice shows respect for the food and gratitude to those who prepared it. It also reflects good manners and cleanliness.
If something is too tricky to eat with chopsticks, it’s perfectly okay to ask for a fork or spoon. In fact, traditional Japanese meals often include a saji (spoon) for soft dishes. Use what helps you enjoy your meal best—respectfully.
Chapter 4: Choosing the Right Chopsticks
Using chopsticks with grace starts with finding the right pair for you.
Length, Thickness & Weight
Chopsticks should feel comfortable in your hand. While 23 cm is a common length for men and 21 cm for women, the ideal size depends on your hand size and personal preference. If possible, try holding different types in person to see what feels right.
Tip Shape
Chopstick tips vary—some are round, others square, and some have textured or non-slip surfaces. For slippery foods like noodles, chopsticks with square tips or grip-enhancing textures can make eating easier.
Material Matters
- Lacquered Wood
These chopsticks are coated with layers of lacquer, giving them a glossy, refined finish. They’re available in a range of colors and patterns, including traditional designs and gold leaf accents. They’re durable and stay beautiful for years.
- Natural Wood
Crafted from woods like cherry, chestnut, or cedar, these chopsticks highlight the wood’s natural grain and texture. They feel warm and organic in the hand.
- Bamboo
Bamboo chopsticks are light, flexible, and surprisingly strong. Their easy handling makes them perfect for everyday use.
In Japan, having your own pair of chopsticks is part of everyday culture. They also make meaningful gifts. Couples often use matching sets called meoto-bashi (husband-and-wife chopsticks), symbolizing togetherness. With so many beautiful designs to choose from, enjoy finding a pair that feels uniquely yours.
Chopsticks are more than just tools—they reflect the heart of Japanese culture and tradition.
By using them properly and understanding the manners behind them, you’ll find even more joy in Japanese meals.
We hope this guide helps deepen your appreciation for the beauty of Japan’s food culture.
For more essential Japanese etiquette, please see below.
